The Fat Child by K.A. Robinson

Nobody asks “what is it like being the fat child”
But I’ll answer the question, so the speculation can end.

Being the fat child means you’re not a person, just numbers and letters

42% BMI
8.1 A1C

Being the fat child means you’re a sounding board for unsolicited advice

“Why don’t you just walk more?”
“We can diet together”
“Wow, do you think that’s the best thing to eat right now?”

Being the fat child means you must be misreable all the time, even when you’re not

“Are you really [looks at my body] happy?”

Being the fat child means you only improve by losing weight
whatever it takes…

Because eating 500 calories a day means people may finally ask you about the last book you read

Binging and Purging may mean you’re siblings call you to say they miss you

Overworking out could mean that your parents care about how your day at the office was

Because as you waste away inside, thats when people finally want you around

Because as you’re slowly dying, thats when you are cared about again

As if I cant be inspiring at 320 lbs
As if I am not a worthwhile person even with High Blood Pressure
As if I’m not worthy to have humanity with Type 2 Diabetes

Everyone in the family is “concerned” about your health, because they want your autonomy

Maybe when I drop 100 lbs, they will care that I defended my disseration
Or that I got a promotion within work
Or I am finally making positive strides with my mental health

But despite all of this, I may never shake the title of

The Fat Child

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